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[with 3 poems by Marilyn Hedgpeth]
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The Lightness of Reprieve
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Standing at our friend’s threshold,
pockets padded with tissues,
we steel ourselves for heartache,
prepare to embrace longer than usual,
voice our true affections,
stutter through farewells.
To our surprise, she rallies,
rises from her sick bed,
responds to the attention,
the memories, the bonds we share.
Glancing back as we leave,
we see her waving from the doorway.
 . 
Later, we knock at the door of a cousin
recovering from a cardiac procedure.
She claims to feel ten years younger.
We fill this bonus time with laughter
and celebrate the lightness of reprieve.
 . 
Arriving home, we cringe to find
ruffled remains of a red-bellied
woodpecker, feathery outline still visible
on our glass door.
We gather its hollow form,
place it tenderly, respectfully,
in a shallow hole, hallowing
the fragility of life
at our own doorstep.
 . 
Marilyn Hedgpeth
from The Lightness of Reprieve, Finishing Line Press, Georgetown, KY; © 2024
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❦ ❦ ❦
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Feb 20, early morning drive: slant light across the fields sets fire to every third tree along the highway. Dark orange, deep red, their crowns glow, a bright haze of flowers at the tips of a million twigs. Almost Spring, and the first maples are blooming.
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Witch hazel has dropped her petals, spent; now maple lifts the baton. Here in the Southeastern USA, maple is one of the earliest trees to bloom. Blossom bud break is triggered in mid-February, primarily by lengthening daylight regardless of weather, weeks before the leaf buds swell and burst. Check the pollen burn in your eyes and nose – you’ll know when those flowers have opened.
 . 
As opposed to most garden flowers which present both pistil and stamen in the same bloom (namely bisexual), maple is, like many trees, monoecious – there are separate male flowers and female flowers on the same tree, even on the same stem. Male red maple flowers look like little ruby crowns of spiky stamens; the female flowers are a bouquet of drooping red pistils.
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But it gets trickier. Some red maples bear only male flowers, while others bear only female (this separation termed dioecious). And individual trees can shift. One year a tree may be male, the next year half and half, the following year all female. The prevalence of Male vs. Female flowers doesn’t seem to be either a cause or an effect of the overall health of the tree. Why?! Why do they do this? What purpose does all this variability serve the tree or the community of red maples?
 . 
I don’t know but the tree knows. Perhaps it’s communicating with all its neighbor maples through its underground network of mycorrhizal fungus, collaborating to decide who’s going to make lots of pollen this year and who’ll make the seeds (and maples do make lots of those little winged seeds). Perhaps their network extends throughout the local woodland and into the next county. Acer rubrum is one of the most plentiful trees east of the Mississippi, from Newfoundland to Florida. Perhaps it creates one vast collective knowing, guiding the roots, the bole, the twigs that will bud into flowers, male or female. Perhaps.
 . 
February into March, every morning the scarlet halo expands. Every day we’re closer to Spring. Every afternoon more sneezes and water from my eyes. Glorious! I trust those maple trees utterly – they certainly know what they’re doing.
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❦ ❦ ❦
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Mirror Images
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Sliding into a booth,
leather cool to my legs,
we take menus in hand;
we glance around,
tempted by lavish meals
rising before other patrons.
An adjacent mirrored wall
makes the tavern seem
twice its size, twice as lively.
 . 
Across smooth Formica,
you sip ice water,
watching as your doppleganger
tucks a wayward wisp of hair
into her head-scarf.
Maybe that’s an alternate universe,
you say, and this table,
our point of intersection.
Maybe while we grow older, 
grayer, wiser perhaps, 
they grow younger
healthier, more vital and able.
 . 
We toast to what’s possible,
to friendship, regardless.
Condensation drips from our tumblers,
while frost still clings to those
of our glassy companions.
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Marilyn Hedgpeth
from The Lightness of Reprieve, Finishing Line Press, Georgetown, KY; © 2024
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❦ ❦ ❦
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There is, after all, no reprieve. This morning as we’re talking to the palliative care nurse who is  interviewing my mother, my father asks, “Does everyone end up in Hospice?” Or did he say, “Will I end up in Hospice?” It’s a fair question, even for someone not 97 years old. Every year that passes, Dad announces he’s planning to live five more years. One may hope, but perhaps one shouldn’t plan on it.
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The title poem in this first collection by Marilyn Hedgpeth, The Lightness of Reprieve, confronts this reality. Marilyn’s friend will die of cancer very soon and yet the two of them are surprised to share a vibrant afternoon together; Marilyn’s cousin might have died from her heart condition but now feels reborn; Marilyn returns home to confront the death of a beautiful bird on her own doorstep. Other poems throughout the book touch upon our mortality from many different angles, sometimes head on, sometimes in metaphor and with the lightest touch of benediction. I sense a deep abiding theme of sharing. We rarely share with each other this common knowledge that our lives will most definitely end; what we do share is stories and a gift of ripe strawberries; imagination and laughter; silent moments of togetherness; prayer.
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And in sharing don’t we experience reprieve? These are not poems of grief for time lost. These are poems of celebration for time shared. Marilyn has no doubt sat with the bereaved many, many times in her years as a minister, but this is not a book of counsel. These are simply poems of our simple human commonality. I step into the poems and accept my own sadness – sadness lifts as it is borne by many other shoulders. The yoke is not removed from me, but for a few steps along this journey I might almost imagine its lightness.
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❦
 
Marilyn Hedgpeth recently retired as a Presbyterian (USA) Minister of Word and Sacrament after 24 years of “preaching / teaching / leading / loving life.” The Lightness of Reprieve is available from Finishing Line Press HERE
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❦ ❦ ❦
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Last Leaf
(with a nod to O. Henry)
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One Final Rusty Leaf
clings to the dogwood tree
outside our bedroom window.
Resisting the wind’s wrestling,
it beckons me back to a time
when I painted a single leaf
on our patio wall:
my Hail Mary attempt
to prolong the life of my father
as modern medicine failed,
as the leaves fell.
 . 
Desperate to bring him hope;
venturing outside the boundaries
of my own knowledge and faith,
I scheduled an appointment
with a local healer, Chief Two Trees.
But when travel became impossible,
I resorted to that lone leaf
and a no holds barred prayer.
 . 
After he died, I continued to paint,
self-medicating stroke by stroke,
adding to my winter wall-garden:
fern, forget-me-not, bleeding heart,
wisteria, live-for-ever;
each new leaf, petal, blossom,
balm to my wound.
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Marilyn Hedgpeth
from The Lightness of Reprieve, Finishing Line Press, Georgetown, KY; © 2024
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❦ ❦ ❦
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2020-06-11a Doughton Park Tree

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[with 3 poems from Tar River Poetry]
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Submersible
 . 
+++ “Red Sky at Morning”
++++++ – for Peter Makuck
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All day and into the evening sullen rain has bucketed dow upon us,
and I think of Peter and the blue-black coastal squalls purpling seaward.
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Ignoring heavy weather is what natives do on Emerald Isle. Years ago
I failed to talk him and Phyllis into fleeing Hurricane Florence, a monster
 . 
storm grinding on Wilmington. Likewise, I used to remind my rother
at Kitty Hawk, half-joking, that he lived in the middle of the god-damned
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Atlantic Ocean. He never listened either – even after his son refused
evacuation from Hurricane Isobel and almost drowned inside their cottage
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with his loyal dog and bobbing bamboo furniture. Tenaciously, Peter and
Phyllis have been anchored to their apartment for years, weathering cancer
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treatments and the Pandemic. Finally – like my father decades ago –
Peter had had enough of chemo, remission, drug cocktails and radiation,
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so six weeks back he stopped. Meanwhile the world obsesses over five men
trapped in the submersible Titan, its only hatch bolted from the outside and
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the seven ways it’s supposed to shed weight and resurface from its great drop
down to Titanic’s ghost spines. The one porthole is small. They’re out of air.
 . 
Peter too has begun a long descent through the murky waters of memory,
morphine, and goodby to land finally (I hope) upon the soft silt of forever.
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Everyone’s half-waiting for the last storm to fade and for Peter – teacher, poet,
and sailor – to resurface and note with delight, again, a red sky at night.
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Don Ball
from Tar River Poetry, Volume 63 Number 1, Fall 2023, Greenville NC.
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❦ ❦ ❦
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As soon as he hops from the car he’s Tyrannosaurus, miniature dangling forelegs, ferocious jaw gaping as he swivels his head side to side, Linda and me his prey. While we wait for food Chameleon appears, thin compressed lips, deliberate robot-like ratcheting gait, front digits at right angles all asplay. Later we interrupt our walk for him to climb the big rock, Gila Monster, but then he elongates his body along a fissure and becomes Chuckwalla.
 . 
Boys are animals. This boy, though, is the master of animals. Not only in transforming himself one into another but also in the thousand and one details he can tell us about their lives and characteristics. We imagine his kindergarten teacher’s eyebrows rising higher and higher at the revelations he pours forth. And what is the best place to really mix it up with animals? Besides, that is, the back yard – bird feeders, bunnies, snakes, hens – and walks along the greenway – deer, skinks, herons, eagles? Well, of course the North Carolina Zoological Park!
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This is the second straight year we’ve spent my birthday at the Zoo with Bert. And with about a thousand other boys and girls of every possible age, shape, size, and color. Come to the Zoo and see the wild children! What other place can keep kids walking for hours and miles with minimal meltdowns? (And what other place features Polar Bear pee and Gorilla poop, fascinating stuff.) Just pack plenty of snacks and you won’t hear the first whine. And while we adults are rewarded minute by minute with Bert’s company, it’s only fair to end the day with one final reward for him at the gift shop. Another addition to the home menagerie. Next time we’re together, I’ll be sure to keep my fingers to myself when Boy Snapping Turtle meets me at the door.
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❦ ❦ ❦
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The Dead
 . 
We want to button them to us,
wear them like clothes. We want
to savor our morning café au lait
with them, hold yoga poses,
walk dogs, skateboard, eat sushi,
rake leaves, stream movies, tango
dribble basketballs with them.
We want them to ride beside us,
windows down, singing
along with our favorite playlists.
We want to tuck them in books
to mark our place, jingle them
in our pockets, lucky coins,
hook them over our arms
like umbrellas to keep us dry.
Coming home at night, we want
the porchlight’s yellow halo
to mean they’re waiting up.
As our key turns the lock,
we pray they’ll call out to us
from the empty rooms
of our dark house.
 . 
Janis Harrington
from Tar River Poetry, Volume 63 Number 1, Fall 2023, Greenville NC.
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❦ ❦ ❦
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I first immersed myself in Peter Makuck’s poetry when I was poet-in-residence at the NC Zoo in 2012. I was working on the Poetry of Conservation project, selecting poems by North Carolina writers that might be displayed in the park, and I also published daily posts of my observations (spending all day every day in the Zoo – it doesn’t get better than that!). In my very first post I featured Peter’s poem, My Son Draws an Apple Tree, a beautifully simple poem that cuts to the truth of the bittersweet relationship between father and son. Peter’s collection in which the poem appears, Long Lens, is filled with generous, haunting, contemplative recollections and themes.
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Peter Makuck founded Tar River Poetry and served as its editor for decades during his tenure at East Carolina University. The current issue arrived this week [vol 63, nr 1, fall 2023] and is dedicated to him – he died last year at the age of 83. Peter inspired me through his writing but equally through his generosity and friendship. Somehow we struck up an email correspondence through the years, first about poetry, then about the NC coast, nature sightings, just stuff we discovered we had in common. Even when wearing his editor’s hat – and I have accumulated more rejections than acceptances from him and Luke Whisnant, the current editor – he was never anything but encouraging and giving of himself. He would have liked me to believe that I, even I, could write poetry as worthy as his own.
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❦
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Tar River Poetry is a journal of national stature and reputation, but the three poems I’ve featured today are all by North Carolina writers who appear in this current issue (the wonderful poem One Year Old by Rebecca Baggett is also in this issue but space constraints etc.). Check out TRP and join me in subscribing HERE
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Long Lens by Peter Makuck is available HERE. Learn more about Peter and his other books HERE
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❦ ❦ ❦
 . 
Picking Up Trash with My Sister
on Crab Orchard Road
 . 
She plunges a foot into the dry ditch,
tosses cans, plastic bottles, empty
cigarette packs onto the gravel road
so we can sort them into garbage
and recycling. As she works she asks,
Is this poison ivy? Is this?, trusting me
to protect her as I’ve trusted her since my beginning,
older sister in pictures at ages five and three,
reading to me as we sit on the sofa,
feet sticking straight out, book open in her lap,
pink cat’s eye classes she pushed with one finger
back up her nose.
 . 
And later, at nine and eleven, trying
to sooth with the only stories that made sense:
we’re fleeing the potato famine in Ireland
or Nazis coming to take us away
that morning we heaped dolls into blankets,
shoved clothes into flowered suitcases, fearing
each floorboard creak might be our father
come home to carry out night’s drunken threat
to shoot our mother.
 . 
My sister stomps a beer can flat,
drops it in her bag, slips a Styrofoam cup
into mine. Who would do this? she says,
shaking her head, pushing dark purple glasses
with one finger back up her nose. She twists the lid
from a water bottle, pours the last sip
over the roots of a wilted aster
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Pam Baggett
from Tar River Poetry, Volume 63 Number 1, Fall 2023, Greenville NC.
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❦ ❦ ❦
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[ with 3 poems by Rae Spencer]
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Adaptation
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Some days I hardly remember
what it is to fly
 . 
what loss is
When morning feels like betrayal
and shoulders ache
with the sudden load of gravity
pressed into cruel bones
too human for wings
 . 
As if I never once awoke
hair smelling of clouds
wound in wild knots
and damp with tears
 . 
or slept
curled in a crevice of wind
 . 
Other days I recall myself
grace confined to memory
in which I have never flown
and it was only ever a tale
from childhood
I was never meant to believe
 . 
Rae Spencer
from Watershed, Kelsay Books, American Fork, Utah; © 2023
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❦ ❦ ❦
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A shift in warmth of Pacific seas, a wet winter in the South: throughout January a storm a week, sometimes two, but this afternoon we are braving mud to hike our favorite trail from Carter Falls to Grassy Creek. The little farm pond is full and we see the channel where it overflows to carve a deeper path through last summer’s grasses and sedges. Both white pine groves have evidence of freshets, scoured hardpan courses with needles layered thick along each side. We cross Martin Byrd Road to enter the woods that curve alongside the big cornfield and wonder what we’ll find. Even though the acres are planted in winter rye, how much soil has rushed off those slopes and furrows into Grassy Creek?
 . 
The trail quickly turns downhill and we see the storms’ impact. Red field clay has silted full the first drainage swale and overtopped it to rush down the trail bed in a boiling soupy froth. Exposed roots and deep mud. Our trail crews clean out these erosion control features twice a year but one wet January has damaged the trail more than ten years of hikers’ boots. Too much water, too much incline, too much gravity.
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Neither will nor wisdom inform its seep, writes Rae Spencer of water. It must seek its level, it must flow, it must rush. Water and time alike, each of them relentless and not to be held back. Have I spent too much of my life rushing? Have I abandoned will and wisdom to be always doing, doing? Even now my dreams are filled with urgency, long hallways, behind each door a patient fretting to be seen, and I with no hope of catching up. Waking from such, who would want to get out of bed and get started?
 . 
Better trail design can’t completely compensate for poor tillage and agricultural neglect, but the rest of today’s trail is actually in quite good shape. The outer berm has been mostly raked clear and there are several grade dips and rises that keep water from following the treadway. When we reach the more rustic forest bathing trail, it’s even better – consistent outsloping camber, plenty of runoff. Water’s gonna rush. Life too, I guess. How to prepare? How to respond? How to slow things down for a bit? A walk through quiet woods, a quiet hour with a book of poetry – maybe tonight my dreams will proceed more leisurely.
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❦ ❦ ❦
 . 
Of Warbler and Quail
 . 
Drab little she in the brush
Muttering her song to lure
Someone else
 . 
But only I respond
Drawn across the dune
To listen closer
 . 
As a child I spoke to quail
I whistled out their bobwhite name
To hear them shriek it back
 . 
But this little warbler
outside my beachfront door
Her accent slips my ear
 . 
Measures of water wisdom
Refrains of woven nest
Codas that fall silent
 . 
Because I have come too near
To understanding
What is lovely on this shore
 . 
Of daily tide
Of sandy soil and storms
Of quickening flocks
 . 
That speak their sea-swept names
In secret tangled tongues
Of salty sail and oar
 . 
And then they fly away
While I struggle, yearn to say
What I remember of briars
 . 
Of dry summer streams
And winter dreams
Of silent quail
 . 
Hungry among the thistle
Of home, my distant valley home
So many years from here
 . 
Rae Spencer
from Watershed, Kelsay Books, American Fork, Utah; © 2023
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❦ ❦ ❦
 . 
Memory – home – loss – the path forward: Rae Spencer’s poetry has a distinctly formal feel as she settles deeply into these themes. Formal in the sense of meticulous language, lush natural imagery and description, architectural lines, internal rhyme. These poems need to be read slowly as they linger in the moment before releasing one to ponder and discover the writer’s metaphors, and discovering one’s own.
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Watershed from Kelsay Books is an antidote to compulsion, to insistence, to the headlong rush into the next thing and the next. I am perfectly happy to pause and listen with warbler and bobwhite as the poet weaves from their stories one of longing for home (Of Warbler and Quail). I think I’m ready now for racoon to teach me how to live (Adaptable). At the close of Doppler Effect, I sit and listen long to the change in pitch of life I know I must expect, and prepare for, as my own parents age and travel their final days.
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Poetry, in its phrasing, its junctures, its juxtaposition, often moves at the pace of breath. Speak it aloud, pause when it needs you to. Stop and linger in the midst of these lines so that they may breathe into you.
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❦
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[hint: I re-type the poems for these posts (thank you to my freshman touch typing teacher), fingers slower than scanning eyes, speaking the words individually in my head, each syllable and carriage return (aka line break) – so often in the adagio the lines reveal secrets of how they mean.]
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Rae Spencer lives in Virginia, USA. As well as writing, she is a practicing veterinarian. Of Warbler and Quail first appeared in Bolts of Silk. Gravity first appeared in vox poetica.
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Watershed is available from Kelsay Books HERE. Learn more about Rae HERE.
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❦ ❦ ❦
 . 
Gravity
 . 
Water doesn’t want
It only weighs
 . 
Neither will nor wisdom inform its seep
Downhill, settling to the lowest pool
 . 
Rivers cascade and marshes ooze
Toward inlet and gulf
Where tides surge
 . 
With the arid moon
Sere face lowered
In serene reflection
Over oblivious blue
 . 
Depths that teem with tin and polyp
Oyster clades awash in brine
That neither murmurs nor sighs
Through a shell
 . 
Held to the ear we hear
Blood’s heave
An eternal chorus
Singing sailors to sea
Dreamers to sleep
 . 
Daughters to voice
Their bare feet anchored
In restless churn
On heavy, ancient shores
 . 
Rae Spencer
from Watershed, Kelsay Books, American Fork, Utah; © 2023
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❦ ❦ ❦
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